The first thing we love about Korea is that they have a very good system set up for their orphans. Most children are in foster care and the guidelines to become foster parents are rigid. Adults wanting to foster must be at least 30, they must be married and the wife must be a stay at home mom and if the couple has children the youngest must be at least five. Babies that are put up for adoption typically go into a lage nursery type setting where they are given excellent round the clock care until they are adopted domestically or put into a foster home. We were told it is not unusual for a baby or child in the foster system to have a record of being hospitiliazed, multiple times, and not to be concerned about this. If a child contacts something as simple as a cold or other viral condition they will let the ailment run its course in the hospital. We are told this is done to help combat the spread of illness.
Most babies are put up for adoption because of unwed mothers. The Korean culture greatly frowns upon single mothers raising their children. Fortunately most "referrals" (this is what they call the picture and info you receive on a child) come with information about the birth parents and why the child was placed up for adoption. Although we were warned sometimes information is very limited, whatever they have on the child we will get. We feels this is such a blessing to be able to give our child some type of information about who they came from. Our adoption agency requires that we write a letter and make a photo album for the birth parents. We were ovejoyed to do this!!! I really cannot imagine the pain that comes with putting a child up for adoption but hope that the letter and pictures might help reassure and heal the parents.
When we decided to adopt we agreed on a girl since we already have a little boy. Since learning more about Korea we have had to change our mindset. Korea is really pushing for an increase in domestic adoption and because of that 85% of children up for international adoption are boys. The reason for this is because in the Korean culture blood line is very important. It is not such a big deal to adopt a girl if you are Korean but to adopt a boy means someone from another blood line will carry your name and that does not settle well with most traditions. Either way we cannot wait to add to your family!
Since Korea is promoting more domestic adoption, eventually the country's goal is to close down international adoption completely. Unfortunately that is a big bummer for the families waiting for their children to come home. Each year Korea will decrease the number of Visa's they give out to families adopting internationally, this in turn makes the wait even longer. We were just informed that the average wait for a referral has gone up from 9 - 12 months to 12-15. I can't lie and say I wasn't sad about this but with my sadness came peace. God is in control, He has a baby for us and He will make it happen. Might take some time but eventaully we will get our little one. How Exciting!!!
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
How do we even get started?
Once we decided to adopt we looked into Bethany, Holt and Dillon but not one of those agencies were letting more families into their Korean Program. Families enrolled with these companiess were already waiting so long. We stopped looking for a while until Ron said that with as busy as he was at work I was going to need to be responsible for doing some research into the matter. I started looking and didn't come up with much. We were feeling pretty beat down about the whole thing and were about to give up the whole idea. I was praying about the issue and was pretty upset because I was certian I had heard form the Lord on this and that He was calling our family to adopt. I didn't see how we could adopt if we couldn't even get into a program. I basically just said " I need some direction here and I need it soon!" Two days later I received an interesting email. My Aunt Elsie, my fathers sister, sent out an email to her family members just to let us know that her niece from the other side of the family,someone we had never met or even heard about before, was adopting from Korea. She included a blog site and some general information. I went to the blog site and there was the name of the adoption agency they were using. The agency was out of NY but worked with families from different states and had a networking agency in Kalamazoo,MI. I nearly fell off my chair. Some might consider this coincidence but we knew better, it was clear this was an answer to prayer: God's direction! We called the agency and found out they were accepting more families. It took some time and some more prayer but eventually everything fell into place. I am amazed at God and how He works, not only did we get direction but Spence Chapin has a fantastic record and have been nothing but promt and professional. We see His hand at work in every area of this adoption.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
The Process so Far...
March 5, 2011 – Webinar video through Spence Chapin
March 7, 2011 – Received application from Spence Chapin
March 7-12, 2011 – Gathered info and doctors notes for application
March 14, 2011 – Sent in application to Spence Chapin
March 15 – May 15, 2011 – Work on getting financial statement that guaranteed payment for adoption
May 16, 2011 – Officially accepted into Spence Chapin –Hooray!
May 20, 2011 – Send application to FAC (local agency through which home study will be done )
May 27, 2011 – Receive acceptance from FAC along with a HUGE packet of paperwork to fill out
May 28 – June 24, 2011 – Gathered info, wrote essays, had physical exams and finished all paperwork in packet.
June 24, 2011 - Packet sent out to FAC
June 30, 2011 – FAC informs us paperwork is completed correctly and we are assigned a social worker
July 19, 2011 – 1st Home Study
July 21, 2011 - Korea Webinar through Spence Chapin
July 26, 2011 – Made picture book and wrote letter for birthparents
Aug 4, 2011 – 2nd Home Study
Sept 5, 2011 - Received finished Home Study Report
Sept 7, 2011 - Sent in I-600a form with home study to governemt to obtain visa
Sept 7, 2011 - Sent all material for dossier to Spence Chapin
Sept 14, 2011 - Received government confirmation and given date of fingerprinting ( 4 weeks YUCK!)
Oct 14, 2011 - Fingerprints Complete
Oct 18, 2011 - Received notice that our forms were being processed from government
Oct 28, 2011 - Received call from Spence - Chapin that our home study needed to be changed, changed homestudy that day and talked to our officer at Homeland Security, she held our case until she received the new homestudy.
Oct 29, 2011 - Received new homestudy
Oct 31, 2011 - Mailed out new homestudy to Homeland Security Officer
Nov 7, 2011 - We are APPROVED -I-171H form received!!! YIPEE!
Nov 9, 2011 - Faxed I-171H form to Spence Chapin
Dec 21, 2011 - Dossier sent to SWS - OFFICIALLY WAITING!
Sept 5, 2011 - Received finished Home Study Report
Sept 7, 2011 - Sent in I-600a form with home study to governemt to obtain visa
Sept 7, 2011 - Sent all material for dossier to Spence Chapin
Sept 14, 2011 - Received government confirmation and given date of fingerprinting ( 4 weeks YUCK!)
Oct 14, 2011 - Fingerprints Complete
Oct 18, 2011 - Received notice that our forms were being processed from government
Oct 28, 2011 - Received call from Spence - Chapin that our home study needed to be changed, changed homestudy that day and talked to our officer at Homeland Security, she held our case until she received the new homestudy.
Oct 29, 2011 - Received new homestudy
Oct 31, 2011 - Mailed out new homestudy to Homeland Security Officer
Nov 7, 2011 - We are APPROVED -I-171H form received!!! YIPEE!
Nov 9, 2011 - Faxed I-171H form to Spence Chapin
Dec 21, 2011 - Dossier sent to SWS - OFFICIALLY WAITING!
Friday, August 12, 2011
Why?
It seems like when you've had a child and they get to the age of two the only question you begin to hear is " when are you having another?" Every time someone asked us this question we would look at each other... We didn't know when. Soon Ron asked me "when" too? For some reason I always felt this funny pit in my stomach whenever anyone would bring it up. It wasn't that I didn't want more babies, it's hard to explain the feeling, I just knew I couldn't see myself pregnant again at the time. I didn't know why but God did. He had a baby for us, only I was not going to physically carry the child, we would carry this baby in our hearts.
Long before Ron and I were married we both knew we wanted to adopt a child one day. It was something that God placed in both our hearts. A desire to give a child a home. I think we both figured that we would look into adoption after we had a few kids of our own and were more financially secure but our timing is not God's timing. I had this "feeling" deep in my heart and I began to pray. One day while praying,I started crying and was feeling so very unsettled and I heard the Lord asked me, "Why are you crying." I said I think I wanted to adopt and I didn't know how that was going to happen. He told me to ask him for a baby, so I did. He said "OK I have one for you." Gee why didn't I talk to him sooner!!!!
So why are we adopting? God gave us the desire and told us now was time. We chose to gladly obey!
Long before Ron and I were married we both knew we wanted to adopt a child one day. It was something that God placed in both our hearts. A desire to give a child a home. I think we both figured that we would look into adoption after we had a few kids of our own and were more financially secure but our timing is not God's timing. I had this "feeling" deep in my heart and I began to pray. One day while praying,I started crying and was feeling so very unsettled and I heard the Lord asked me, "Why are you crying." I said I think I wanted to adopt and I didn't know how that was going to happen. He told me to ask him for a baby, so I did. He said "OK I have one for you." Gee why didn't I talk to him sooner!!!!
So why are we adopting? God gave us the desire and told us now was time. We chose to gladly obey!
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