Thursday, November 8, 2012

Finally a Resolve...getting back to myself


I can be a skeptic when it comes to spiritual attacks and I think that sometimes people give the devil WAY TOO much credit for their problems. I also think that sometimes we do not discern true spiritual attacks. Since deciding to be obedient to God and start this adoption journey, I have had one health problem after another come at me. All of it in direct connection to my reproductive system. I cannot let myself get pregnant right now, we signed paperwork and contracts that we would not try for another baby while adopting. I have been told by my OB-GYN that getting pregnant would be the best thing for my body right now, due to my endometriosis. I have had surgery and been very proactive in trying to get my body to work properly. I do not understand nor can explain why now, the time when we are adopting, everything in my body has gone haywire except to say that to me this seems like a spiritual attack. I can say that from what I have learned growing up is that when you are "under attack" from the devil it typically mean you are doing what God has called you to do. (although not always).

The last few weeks and truly if I'm honest with myself the last few months have been hard on my health and my psyche. I was put on a medication almost a year ago, to help with my endometriosis The medication was a shot and I received an injection every 3 months. It was a very strong med and there were numerous side effects.

The first few months were okay but then this past August, my world in a sense flipped upside down. It started soon after my birthday with extreme dizziness( to the point of me falling over) and terrible headaches. Long story short I went to the doctor, was prescribed some meds that didn't really help and was given what now looks like a wrong diagnosis. My blood tests came back normal and so I saw a chiropractor who really relieved some tension and the headaches got better.(I am still seeing the chiro and am now a true believer in them!)Unfortunately my other symptoms persisted, got weirder and I became convinced something serious was wrong. After another evaluation a CT and MRI were ordered.They were testing me for a possible tumor or more likely MS! All tests came back normal. To which I Praise the Lord and had a few good cries about. Thank you Jesus!!!

 I was sent to another specialist and had more blood work and today received really good news. My hormones are completely out of whack because of the medication I was put on almost a year ago. After going off that medication my body was suppose to return to normal but it did not and as a result my hormones are messed up. The Physician Assistant I saw today said my levels were very low especially for my age, in fact they were so low that the results came back at 0.01. This reading means that I have almost no estrogen or progesterone in my body. I'm thrilled to hear this because all of the crazy symptoms I have been having correlate to extreme estrogen loss. I am now on a plan to have replacement (all natural) therapy to get my body to a natural state.

The last few weeks while waiting for results have been tough, so many things run through your mind. I was so scared that this was going to be something really life changing. I know many people go through really bad things and it is hard if not impossible to let your imagination run wild. How blessed we are to have a heavenly Father that walks right along with us no matter the outcome of the tests, He is always there.

I guess I am writing this post mainly because I so HAPPY to be healthy and with a plan to get myself back on track but also as an encouragement to others who are doing as God called them and it's not going how they thought it would. I can say that during alot of this I have spent time in the Word, listening to sermons and praying. Edifying my Spirit! It doesn't stop your  mind but it does remind you to to get it under control. We do need to be aware of the spiritual realm and that there is a very present enemy who seeks to kill, steal and destroy but I will just end with this.

                                                                   Our God is Greater
                                                                   Our God is Stronger
                                                                   Our God is Higher than any other
                                                                   And if our God is for us, who can be against us